Friday, June 13, 2014
Nothing to worry about, right?
Nothing could possibly go wrong.
In fact, if the skies are clear this evening, the rising moon could be a spectacular sight. Yet another opportunity for me to wish I'd bought a long lens for the DSLR camera. But those times are rare, and others are much better photographers than I.
I remember one time I wanted to get a shot of a super moon rising over the Appalachian Mountains, which I can see from my back porch. I thought driving to a nearby church cemetery on a hilltop would give me a better view of it, but when I got there it was nowhere to be found in the sky. I'd seen it from the back yard, but less than half a mile away the angle from the hilltop provided no view of it at all.
Weird. Anyway, I'll be checking the sky tonight and hoping to get a glimpses of the Honey Moon. A full moon on Friday the 13th won't happen again in my lifetime unless I live to be 98. I guess that's possible, but as far as I know no one in my family has lived that long, so I'm not counting on it.
I've been feeling … not quite right, lately. My unease is a combination of physical and emotional symptoms including odd and irritating rashes, headaches and crushing fatigue.
If I don't get something done in the morning, for example, when my energy level is at its highest, it doesn't get done. Like dinner. Forget dinner. Last night I told my husband how to cook sausage links on the George Foreman grill. (He is definitely domestically challenged.) I ate a bowl of watermelon, which I'd cut up earlier in the day.
Thank the goddess, or I would have gone to bed without any supper at all.
As it was, I watched the 6:30 p.m. headlines and was in bed and asleep by 7. I woke up at 6:30 this morning. I'm physically ready to get some things done, but the emotional part of me says it can wait until later.
Malaise. Fatigue. Depression? Maybe. I've nothing to be depressed about, but that's not stopped me before. Endogenous depression (diagnosed by my doctor) has plagued me at various times in my life, but only once have I taken medication for it. And even then, I didn't take it for very long. It made me feel … flat. In the end, the downs were worth it, because I also had ups. On medicine, I had neither.
As I told a friend recently, my motto used to be, "If you're not living on the edge, you're taking up too much space." I don't live by that credo any longer, but I do like a little excitement now and then. It can be as simple as noticing the green beans are coming up in the garden (they are!), or as thrilling as watching a full moon rising.
On Friday the 13th.