We don't need no stinkin' swimsuit. This year, anyway.

Well, that mission was what one might call a fail.

In my defense, I didn't have a lot of time to search. Had I been in a major mall I would have had more options, but I had that Target gift card and didn't try anyplace else.

From the ages of the other clientele in the swim shop, I was clearly out of my element. Oh, well, live and learn. I bought a pair of shoes and a birthday gift for my younger granddaughter with my found money.

I don't even need a swimsuit, really, because I don't swim. We filled in the pool years ago and while I could take a dip in one of the area rivers, I haven't yet done that, and I've lived here 17 years. Not like it's on my bucket list, either.

All I want to do is even up my tan lines, which right now indicate that I mostly wear v-neck tank tops. All my tech tops, which I wear when I walk, fit the v-neck tank category. I have a couple dresses with not-v-neck or lower-v-neck bodices that I could be wearing, if it didn't look so weird.

OH WELL. Summer will be over before we know it, right? And I really don't much care for lying in the sun anyway. Maybe I can get away with wearing a sports bra and shorts while I mow the grass. I'm not in public view for very long while mowing.

Or maybe I'll get some fake spray tan stuff.

Or maybe I'll just wear the damned dresses, tan lines be damned! That would truly be stepping out, now wouldn't it? You know what they say: If you're not living on the edge, you're taking up too much space!

There also was the matter of just not looking good or feeling confident in a swimsuit. Losing 20 pounds would help. I still haven't gotten rid of any of the 7 pounds I gained over the holidays. Reading one of Jen's recent posts, I can definitely identify with being in a comfortable maintenance routine. And I've still lost a lot of weight, even after the slight winter gain, meaning I'm still wearing smaller sizes than I have in many years. I weigh less than I did when I got married almost eight years ago.

I EVEN WEIGH LESS THAN WHAT IT SAYS ON MY DRIVER'S LICENSE!

I look good and feel confident wearing everything but a swimsuit. Especially pajamas. Heh. So I really shouldn't be complaining.

What I should do is push a teeny bit harder, eat a teeny bit cleaner, move a teeny bit more, shake up the routine just a teeny bit. Than, maybe, a teeny-ish swimsuit can happen next year.