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Friday Quote Day

The greatest glory in living lies
not in never falling,
but in rising every time we fall.

~ Nelson Mandela

Because, seriously, what if we never got back up again?

At this point in my weight-losing life, I wonder if I’ll ever reach a normal weight again. It seemed so easy the first time I did it. (That was when my son was born, and he’s old enough to be President now.) Even the second time (12 years ago), while frustrating at first, yielded results after only a couple of months.

I was able to maintain both significant losses for a number of years, and then the pounds started creeping back on.

I’m healthy – blood levels are all normal or nearly so. The only medication I take is a mild diuretic. I can climb stairs without huffing and puffing, and I get plenty of sleep. But at the same time, I’m obese. I hate that word, but whoomp, there it is.

I have, in the past, wondered what would happen if I just quit trying. Well, from Christmas until Inauguration Day, that’s pretty much what happened, and I gained a good, solid six pounds. (We’re in the midst of a bathroom remodel and the scale is packed away right now, so I’m really guessing at the number.)

But the number doesn’t matter so much as what’s behind it. Why don’t I want to get back up? Why do I think one mini-cupcake or handful of chocolate chips or fill-in-the-blank won’t hurt? It always hurts. Always.

So why do I want to hurt myself? Knowing I can run up a flight of stairs doesn’t make me feel nearly as good as zipping up a pair of skinny jeans.

What will it take for me to get back up? I wish I knew.

Comments

Mindy said…
I can completely relate to your frustration. I am coming to the end of two weeks back on Weight Watchers and three weeks at Curves. So far, so good. But the constant arguing with myself over a handful of peanuts or just one cookie is very tiring. Because yes, it does make a difference. I'm trying to look at it as practicing better choices and even a handful of peanuts and a cookie is better than the dozens of cookies I ate over the holidays!
LG said…
It's a question that I ask myself and I'm way heavier than you. I really liked how I looked and so why would I think one this or one that would be so bad?

I have to get it together while it's easier to get it together (i.e., before Jerry Springer comes by and saws off the end of my house to get me out). But sheesh.

Hey, my word verfication is Prine. As in John Prine? :-)
Laura N said…
We can all relate, so at least you're not alone. And you'll work through it. January is almost over, there's new optimism everywhere, spring is coming soon. Things are gonna look up!
denise said…
I'm right there with you - well actually, I'm probably several months behind you. I've been trying to get my head in the weight loss game again for months now - really over a year, but I've only been seriously trying for the last month or so.

I loved it when I lost 60 lbs a few years ago. Swore I'd NEVER gain it back - nope, not me, not this time...yep, you guessed it - it's all back ... A - L -L of it probably a few lbs more if I was willing to get back on the scale and verify it.

I've been going to start walking tomorrow for about 3 months - no walking yet. I've been going back to WW for several months as well...yet haven't been to a meeting. I even bought a Wii Fit back in September and haven't even set it up yet!!!

So I'm also looking for a kick in the pants - or maybe something more like a smack upside the head is in order. Waiting to hear the audible "click" that means I'm "ready" and able to make it work.

Mindy, Lori and Laura are right - at least you're not alone. And, the first one of us to crack the weight loss code needs to be sure to share the secret with the rest of us. Right, ladies?!? Fingers crossed...

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