Sunday, May 17, 2015

Today? Maybe.

I've spent the past week being a lollygagger.

That may not be exactly what's going on, but the result is the same. You can't hit the ball if you don't swing at it.

To be fair, I've had a lot of pain and I'm sure you're as tired of reading about it as I am of writing about it. Or feeling it, for that matter. I would make an appointment if it were sharp, of sudden onset, or if it were truly debilitating.

I just hate seeing the doctor with a vague complaint that isn't any of those things. It's only annoying.

The harder thing this week has been an utter lack of energy and motivation. Am I depressed? Possibly, although I would have to call it endogenous, as there's no external reason AT ALL for me to be down in the dumps. I will be scheduling lab work next month, including thyroid tests, to make sure there's no physical reason for this fatigue. (I've just got too much going on this month to take the time. You know, it's hard work playing Dots and Scrabble on your phone with your leg elevated all afternoon! I'm busy, people, BUSY!)

Today I will make a list. A long to-do list It might be overwhelming to look at, but I know the reward of crossing things off will outweigh any potential dismay. I will put easy things on it – laundry, for instance, which pretty much does itself (thank the goddess I'm not Amish) – and I will put difficult and long-term things on it, too – that PowerPoint project, for instance.

In other news, Lucky updated his journal again. If you follow me on Instagram, you saw a photo last week of some pink honeysuckle growing on our road. Well, he found some, too, on his last day hiking through Pennsylvania. If you Google for images of it, you'll see it's a real thing, but this is the first year I've seen it growing here. (I've been here for 18 years.)

He doesn't describe or write about it, but he'd previously mentioned that he'd "outwalked spring," because he'd stopped seeing wildflowers. So I guess spring is catching up with him.

Maybe my good mood will catch up with me today. I certainly hope so. Lollygagging is for … lollygaggers.

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