Here we go …

The does-he-or-doesn't-he-have-cancer saga continues. 

(For those of you just joining us, my husband had a one-year follow-up endoscopy of his esophagus June 1. He was treated for esophageal cancer in 2019, and declared cured. A small lesion was found, biopsied, and identified as an aggressive and rare esophageal malignant tumor. BUT … a PET scan last week was clear. No evidence of metastasis or tumor. So we need more studies at a teaching hospital.)

This coming Friday we go for a Covid test, either to Summersville (90 miles from home) or Morgantown (200 miles from home), prior to having an endoscopic ultrasound procedure done in Morgantown on Monday. The result will determine if and what kind of treatment he will pursue.

Ruby Memorial Hospital requires a Covid test even if you've been vaccinated. And the test must be done within 72 hours of the scheduled procedure. 

Now we could have the test right here at home. We have a hospital that does them. But they can't GUARANTEE that results will be available by Sunday. (They usually have results in 24 to 48 hours, but … a GUARANTEE? They won't.) And since the patient is … um … determined that there shall be no screw-ups, he's more than willing for me to drive him to a distant WVU-affiliated location for a nasal swab. 

(He would get so lost if I didn't do the driving. And he doesn't know how to drive my car. FOR REAL. And his truck is old and might as well have FARM VEHICLE spray-painted on the side. And yes, I'm an enabler when it comes to him not driving. But seriously, I would worry the whole time.)

I'm trying to find some compassion for him. I was SO angry yesterday. But I managed NOT TO EAT MY ANGER. That was a huge win.

Repeat: I managed NOT TO EAT MY ANGER.

So anyway … here's how this week looks:

Today (Wednesday): FREE DAY. I'll take a long (four miles) walk and spend some time in the sewing room. Also, I registered for an online meal planning class at 3 pm. I've never been able to make meal planning work for me. Hoping this class will help me figure it out.*

Thursday: Get the car serviced at 8:30 am, then run some errands. And walk.

Friday: Drive, drive, drive, nasal swab, turn around, drive, drive, drive. Depending on when we get home, maybe walk.

Saturday: FREE DAY. Looks like it might rain. If it doesn't, I have a walking date set up with a friend and then I'll straighten up the house. I don't like coming home to a messy house, and we'll be out for a couple days. (We have an alarm system and we're not afraid to use it, so don't get any ideas about breaking in while we're gone. HAH!)

Sunday: Head to Morgantown after church.

Monday: Procedure day. We haven't been told what time he's on the schedule yet. The procedure itself takes one to two hours, followed by about a half-hour recovery. I'm guessing an hour for prep. So half a day at the hospital and then back to the hotel. 

Tuesday: Appointment with thoracic surgeon in Morgantown. This appointment was scheduled a couple days ago, and I'm glad it worked out to follow the endoscopy appointment. We'll come home Tuesday afternoon.

How will I work WW-friendly meals into that schedule? Better yet, will I work WW-friendly meals into that schedule? Who the hell knows. I'd love to make that commitment right here and right now, but one thing we've learned traveling post-Covid is that restaurants are frequently closed for dining in and menus are limited. So we'll see, and I'll do the best I can. One thing I don't need is the added stress of not living up to a blue-dot commitment. 

I'm sure I haven't thought everything through, and there will be hiccups along the way. There always are hiccups. I've gotten pretty good at this go-with-the-flow thing, yesterday's anger notwithstanding. Note to universe: Don't fuck with my Zen. Please.

I'm writing to keep things straight in my head, to get my emotions out so they don't overcome my good intentions, and to entertain myself. If you made it this far … thanks for being here. 

*I usually go to the grocery with a list of basics that need to be replenished, and then I add whatever is on sale to the cart. Meals are "planned" around what I bought. My guess is that when you plan meals ahead of time, you buy what you're going to need to cook what you said you'd cook. What a concept!